Saturday, 15 November 2014

G20 Dead Crocodiles

In another sign of the world's human leaders contempt for non-humans, at the conclusion of the G20 Summit today each leader received as a farewell gift an RM Williams compendium from Australia. It was handcrafted from skin ripped off the bodies of Australian saltwater crocodiles.

How are crocodile skin products made? First, thousands of crocodile eggs are stolen from their wild nests, then grown to a suitable size at a crocodile farm before their skin is scraped off to make pretty leather goods such as boots, belts, and handbags. 

Egg abduction may be risky work for the human, but its deadly for the baby crocodile being snatched. According to RM Williams Outback magazine:

Snatched from its home, this baby is off to the skin farm
a small team that gravitates towards the hazardous regions, actively seeking out the crocodiles and, more specifically, their eggs. This team of ‘egg collectors’ uses the significant aerial advantage of helicopters to find nesting grounds. Depending on ground conditions, members of the team either land nearby or are lowered by harness to the nests. This is no mean feat given that adult crocodiles grow up to six metres long. The eggs, numbering between 40 and 70 per nest, have to be carefully handled and marked on site. (Marking eggs is essential to establishing which way up they must remain in transit.) Although emblematic of the wild and dangerous nature of the outback, crocodiles in their infancy are uncharacteristically vulnerable and increasingly so in a changing environment of prolonged and unpredictable rains, which threaten nest sites. The 10-20 minute egg-collecting exercise is performed carefully, as an open nest is rendered hostile to remaining eggs. Recovered eggs are then delivered to be incubated at a crocodile farm where owner and egg-collecting contractor Mick Burns is active at every stage of the trajectory, from assisting in the collection of eggs himself to rearing some of the Territory’s most sizeable and infamous crocodiles. On Mick’s farm, 35 kilometres from Darwin, he has 60,000 crocodiles, ranging in size from 30 centimetres to 5.5 metres. Animals are usually grown until they’re about 1.8m and then processed for their skin. “Our species of croc produces the best skin in the world,” Mick says. “Unfortunately our crocs are the most aggressive species and one of the most difficult to farm. We work pretty closely with traditional owners and station owners to get permission to collect the eggs from the wild. Our skin is sold to the very high-end fashion houses in Europe.” By supporting a market and therefore placing a value on crocodile eggs, farms such as Mick’s seek to encourage the preservation of crocs in the wild. But there’s no getting away from the fact that egg collecting is risky work. “There is no question – it is not for the faint-hearted,” Mick says. “It’s hot, humid and you’re always on edge. It gets the adrenalin going but we take our time and try to keep it all as safe as possible. It is pretty expensive when things go wrong! People say I’m mad and they’re probably right but I am not sure it is because I collect crocodile eggs.” 

The crocodile baby had grown up, but then its skin was pulled from its body.

So as world leaders flick through their crocodile skin compendiums today, there will be more blood on their hands.

Simon Smith And The Amazing Dancing Human

I may go out tomorrow if I can borrow a coat to wear
Oh, I'd cause some pain with a choking chain and my dancing human
Outrageous, alarming, courageous, charming
Oh, who would think a boy and human
Could be well accepted in this room and
Everywhere. It's just amazing how unfair people can be

Seen at the nicest places where well-fed faces all stop to stare
Making the grandest entrance is Simon Smith and his dancing human
They'll love us, won't they?
They feed us, don't they?
Oh, who would think a boy and human
Could be well accepted in this room and
Everywhere. It's just amazing how unfair people can be

Who needs money when you're funny?
The big attraction in this room and
Everywhere will be Simon Smith and his dancing human
It's Simon Smith and the amazing dancing human

…Now back in your cage human, until the next show.

Rewritten by Atman. Written by Randy Newman:

Friday, 7 November 2014

Thursday, 18 September 2014

Grunters Smashing Chicks Magazine

Due in all good newsagents and stores by the 28th August 2014

 Australia's first female-hunting magazine where we predominantly showcase female-hunted stories and pictures. 

 The hunted have a stereo type that the editor who was pig-hunted herself is keen to change by show casing that most of the hunted are everyday people with families that are hunted for the conservation of decent humans who would otherwise be over run by these pests. 
 With sixteen sections on 124 pages full of photos and stories Grunters Smashing Chicks has a fresh professional layout on a high gsm stock. 
 In this issue we bring to you;

* Editors Yarn                      * Trophy Teeth
* Dusk Til Dawn                    * Smashing A broad 
* Hunting For Condemnation     * Grunters Smashing Blokes 
* Hard Hitting Hounds            * Smashing Ferals
* Helpers                             * Fire & Food
* Piglets Smashing Chicks        * Hunted Hotties
* Rank Rides                         * Lost dogs
* Great Southern Land            * Classifieds

Wednesday, 10 September 2014

The People vs Nibbles

In Veterinary Surgeons' Board of Western Australia and Alexander [2014] WASAT 105 Justice Curthoys found that Nibbles and three other guinea pig patients suffered horribly at the hands of their vet due to his unprofessional conduct. The Judge and Members of the Western Australia State Administrative Tribunal effectively upheld findings of veterinary malpractice because:

- The vet treated Nibbles with potentially lethal drug Convenia when "He should have known that Convenia was detrimental to and potentially lethal to guinea pigs". However, the vet in question clearly didn't know this. Instead, he performed a quick Google search about the drug on his mobile phone before plunging the toxic dose into Nibbles. As a result, it was found the vet's "conduct set out in administering Convenia ... to Nibbles fell substantially short of the standards of professional conduct that could reasonably be expected to be observed by members of the veterinary profession of good repute and competency."

A poorly cared for guinea pig
- On another occasion the vet castrated three guinea pigs at their owner's home rather than at his clinic, and then left them under anaesthesia so that "one of the guinea pigs did not regain consciousness after the surgery and died within 24 hours, another regained consciousness but died within approximately 36 hours of the surgery, and the third guinea pig remained immobile for more than 12 hours after the surgery."

The vet thought it acceptable to leave the guinea pigs because he had to go and euthanise a dog, and besides "I had done it on a basis of quite a cheap amount, especially for the amount of time I spent there, I did leave them there, and [the owner] said she would contact me if they didn't wake up." Well, they didn't. 

Thankfully the Judge disagreed with the vet, citing expert evidence that: "the guinea pigs should be walking before they are discharged to the care of an owner." It was also found that such surgery should be performed in the relative safety of a veterinary clinic to minimise risks. Sadly, two of the guinea pigs were killed as a result of such unprofessionalism and reckless indifference to their welfare.

To the females out there, this would be like your doctor performing a hysterectomy while you lay unconscious on your kitchen bench. Then, when he is done, your doctor and anaesthesiologist pull out their tubes and put down their tools as they rush off to another job. "Don't worry" your doctor tells your husband: "just call me if she doesn't wake up."

We await the Tribunal's decision regarding penalty which is due shortly.